Great job Art, both with the story and with yourself. I'm sure your analysis is correct re triggers. I'm also sure this person doesn't put the work in on herself and that as much as it hurt, you're better off not with her in your life. I've gone through the lionizing and demonizing cycles with a borderline and it's very painful and debilitating, especially when I was a dependent personality, which I have mostly stepped out of and now usually wear a new skin