Great messaging. I note that every word applies regardless of whether the parents ever married or if they did marry, divorce, as we did. A parenting partnership and treating each other in ways that send the right lesson does not require staying in a marriage that doesn't work for both parties.

Along the lines of the AAs message, a few years ago I sent an email to my kids that while I was speakimg for myself, it didn't distinguish between mother and father and started with "A parent has 2 prime responsibilities:1A) loving one’s children unconditionally and, especially when the child is young, making sure the child feels loved; 1B) discussing life lessons that the parent has learned. These two things will prepare a child to be an adult and to navigate life. Learning only happens from making mistakes. A parent can discuss lessons it has learned in the hope that the child will recognize that it is in a situation like the parent described and not make a mistake, but learning cannot happen without making mistakes." The specific mistake that I had made that I went on to talk about was choosing a career to make money rather than coosing a career that better fit me and tailoring my lifestyle accordingly. Here's the full email. https://medium.com/illuminations-mirror/life-lessons-and-parents-roles-an-actual-email-to-my-15-year-old-son-and-17-year-old-daughter-48c8ef4f4ccf

As I type this, I should note that despite all I have put myself through from that, and how others have suffered from my failures and failings, I have no regrets over that choice as it's hard to imagine that I would have met their mom and had my kids had I charted a different course.