Great topic Cammie. I am proud of you for addressing your feelings about this in this manner. While you know I am not shy about anything whatsoever, just the other day I published an erotic tanka, my first, in KTHT of all places. The responses, private and public, were interesting.

Here is the tanka.

Sex like love diamond

Many angles to explore

We are fucking hard

Yet passionate kissing while

Enterlocked makes my heart sing

Here is the full story with my explanation of the poem. https://medium.com/know-thyself-heal-thyself/convergence-2cebd3d0a7f9

The choice to use the f-word was frowned on by some privately and I could tell also tell by who did did not clap

This responsive exchange I had with one reader/writer you may find interesting and I suggest you follow through the entire chain https://medium.com/@kimberly.b/phew-this-is-passionately-open-and-admittedly-not-something-i-am-accustomed-to-reading-9bc688c9ac34

as further synchronicity tonight I just placed by second erotic poem in KTHT's Q, this time without an offensive word https://medium.com/know-thyself-heal-thyself/dear-connie-lingus-512a26bddf97

(yet I just found out that Diana is not accepting it---apparently my first piece opened up a can of worms of other submissions that are not aligned with KTHT principles)

granted, being fully hetero my writing about sex does not carry the same baggage as you, which tempts me to write about some not such experiences I have had in life, but, I have teenage kids who have experienced enough shocks from me this year

one suggestion for you while you find your footing, would be to open another account and write under a pen name until such time as you may feel like you can write about sex otherwise--this duality is a not uncommon practice on Medium