Grief has many causes. Divorce, as I know well, is one of them. Your emotions and struggles here trigger memories of my first divorce, which was almost 30 years ago. That marriage never should have happened. Neither Jenny nor I were ready for a lifetime partnership. We were separated on and off for half of the three-year marriage, yet I clung to it like I had slipped out of a window and it were the window sill my fingers grasped as the only thing that stood between me and being Humpty Dumpty after a great fall.

And I struggled with alcohol and drugs.

Getting back to your words that I highlighted here and your emergence from the depths of the despair, I often describe grief thusly: the pain pockets of grief have infinite depth--these chasms can cause tears at a moments notice no matter how much time as elapsed, yet as the caves drain, their infinite depth leaves room for infinite amounts of Light to enter our lives.