He's a nobel laureate in fiction. Not a guru but so influential in my life. https://medium.com/literary-impulse/descortly-poetic-ode-to-the-spiritual-genius-of-hermann-hesse-11799d5833de He wrote Siddartha, which you may have heard of. One of many passages of his I have quoted often, from his Steppenwolf, I feel you will particurally appreciate: "The way to innocence, to the uncreated and to God leads on, not back, … ever deeper into human life. … Instead of narrowing your world and simplifying your soul, you will have to absorb more and more of the world and at last take all of it up in your painfully expanded soul, if you are to ever find peace. This is the road that Buddha and every great man has gone, whether consciously or not, insofar as fortune favored his quest. All births mean separation from the All, the confinement within limitation, the separation from God, the pangs of being born anew. The return into the All, the dissolution of painful individuation, the reunion with God means the expansion of the soul until it is able once more to embrace the All."