I feel your pain because I was the person who did that to my ex-wife 12.5 years ago and I know how much pain it caused her. I did even worse--I said I had decided I had never loved her. I said that because I wanted her to know there was no marriage to be saved--no reason to draw it out with counseling, etc. Saying that is one of my only regrets in life. I've since apologised a few times and we finally got divorced 5 years ago (so much for that clean break--I made a real mess of lots of things) and we have been in a good place as friends from a distance and co parents for many years now. I'm typing this from the couch in the old marital home. I came into the City for my daughter's prom tonight and I'll be back next week for her graduation.