If you want it published as is, it won't go into Illumination. Especially with the last paragraph, it is too easily misread as next time you will pull it off. We have to recast it to where it ends on a positive note and where it is clear that the intent is mental health awareness and suicide prevention. Did you read this one, which was undoubtedly anti-suicide yet DMY still asked me to make it so that no one could misunderstand, so I added the first paragraph and did a heavy edit on the second paragraph.https://medium.com/illumination/suicidal-930e3604f3a1 Please also read this short form of mine, https://medium.com/illumination/in-1996-during-my-first-and-mostly-forgotten-about-foray-into-the-12-stepverse-the-rehab-i-was-at-f40d5a212dd8, the memory therein was triggered by your story--so clearly I get your story (well at first I thought it was a cry for help mixed in with your irreverent humor--is there an element of that?). Please do not read me as religious. I eschew religion. I am very spiritual. https://soulutions17043.medium.com/religion-cannot-stand-spirituality-1422ddf7975c

So bottom line, if you are willing to work with me, then I think I can get it publishable in Illumination. I am sorry that you have been waiting for a decision. I should have been clearer. But I am limited to what I can say about confidential discussions in open channels