Mehmet wrote today "Emotional regulation is consciously observing, understanding, assessing, and managing our triggered or aggravated emotions timely." (https://medium.com/illumination/what-if-depressive-thoughts-and-anxious-feelings-keep-coming-and-never-leaving-895eb0571044) I connected that to John Cunningham's recent article about emotional intelligence. https://medium.com/illumination/you-let-them-do-what-b50fa5399e8d "According to Harvard brain scientist Dr. Jill Bolte Taylor, an emotion sits with you for about 90 seconds. After that, we can consciously decide what to do next. Will you choose to continue to be angry? Or will you become inquisitive and solve the problem? It’s up to you."

I first learned about this from John when I edited his self improvement book, Win the Day. The point is one has to let an emotion subside, to practice the pause before acting. If one keeps feeding fear or allowing others to feed it, it gains so much energy that it is hard to release.