Sometimes I spot a line that stems from a past life. Sometimes I don't have that epiphany until long afterward. In August 2021 I wrote my most complete essayso far geared toward suicide attempt prevention. https://medium.com/illumination/dizain-of-suicide-72bcde4dc8d8 Much of it stems from conversations I had years ago with the soul of my suicided friend Andrew. The essay starts off with this poem I wrote:

Poem title--We Are Only As Sick As Our Secrets

"Suicide provides no relief at all

On ledge imagining end to my pain

Pavement streaming toward me will not end fall

Just before break solution becomes plain

My penance to help others to refrain

Thought my loved ones better off without me

Truth’s too likely they’ll header into sea

Had I known that death cannot be cheated

Baring deep secrets would cure malady

Death would not have left loved ones defeated"

When I wrote the line "My penance to help others to refrain" I was speaking as if I were Andrew's soul doing soul work in heaven.

This year I had a sudden epiphany while re-reading that poem for the umpteenth time. I feel perhaps I suicided in a past life or felt responsible for one and that part of my dharma in this life is to clear that karmic debt by writing about suicide prevention and absolving any loved one left behind of any feelings of guilt. I haven't asked my guides this question yet. Haven't had the opportunity.