Then perhaps baby steps Cris. I have a small publication called ChannSpirations and Coincidences, where we celebrate synchronicities and the every-person-portal. Your communications portals with heaven are open Cris, I KNOW SO, just like when you received that message at 18. Here is my story describing the pub. https://medium.com/illumination/what-is-channspirations-97516b44185a. Here is the link to the pub itself: https://medium.com/channspirations. I am going to add you as a writer. Feel no pressure please. Just opportunity. If and when you feel like submitting a story, I will help you and do not worry about proper imaging and formatting. If you submit in whatever form you can muster from your phone, I will clean up all the mishogas (yiddish for nonsense (sort of)). If you would like easier communication with me that does not require being in a story to do so, if you email me your email address I can add you to the pub's Slack space. It is very little used. Only myself, my two co-editors and two of the other writers communicate there. my email address is solutionman031720@gmail.com