yes we do need to learn that, https://medium.com/illumination-curated/can-we-please-all-find-the-space-within-which-to-breathe-the-same-air-and-agree-not-to-agree-6b6b2c8077ec, but we only have control over own own canoe, and even then it's not the canoe's destination that we can fully control but simply how it reacts to the waves and the currents https://medium.com/channspirations/the-serenity-prayer-df758d99c956